It

Wasted time
Maybe
Luxury in the making
Perhaps
Time is too arrogant for any of us
My reads have become too few
Forgetting me
Leaving rooms unattended in order to conserve the pleasures of It
Unattended rooms
Souls yearning for attention and yet one continues in turning away
Once again forgetting who you are
Not realizing you’re afraid of someone and finally waking up
Sober enough to begin clearing the collected cobwebs in your heart of hearts
The place where breathing comes naturally
It hates everything you love
It demeans all you stand for
It judges whom you stand for
It creates a nest
A place where you are only allowed to walk on cracked, broken glass
It mimics those you love
It despises a healthy smile
It cringes at your creativity
Your art – It considers it all blasphemy
It considers you, unworthy
It walks around – always on duty
And for what?
It builds walls
Ones you were never meant to leave
It curses the very air you breathe
It does not love you
It never did
It needed a body – to cover the empty space in between
It loves no one
Not even the solace of a cold, rotting sun

Elizabeth Mendiola
©2014

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No Know

There are those who seem to know
so much
They are
Bright
Brilliant
Innovative

Filled with purposeful condescension
They glean your empty seat

Eventually granted high positions
Meant only for those who know best

Only to be discovered to know nothing at all

Empty shame

Elizabeth Mendiola
©2014

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Marked Out

Ex you out
That’s how they do it
Right?
Sign the paper
New last name
Change all you have ever known
Telling yourself – “This is a good thing…it’s the Right thing to do”
Forcing yourself to never look back
Changing the station when you hear that song
Styling your hair however you like now
Cooking what you want at 1:00 A.M. in the morning
Leaving the dish in the sink overnight
Smiling because you can
Swearing you are someone else
The girl you once knew, she’s still there
Go get to know her again
But
Promise to never be bitter

By Elizabeth Mendiola
©2014

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My Son

Your heart is my heart
Your fears
Become mine
Trembling, fearful lips
I wish I could cure
By taking your pain away
Your strength gives me mine
Mountains are hard to climb
Especially when you’re all alone – rocks can be tricky and sometimes treacherous
Let me lead the way
never escorting you astray
Your hands and fingers are numb
Keep on climbing, my dear son

By Elizabeth Mendiola
©2014

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Poem – Untitled

Elegance is a piece of paper I write on
Words telling stories about you
And sometimes of me
Drop your pennies here
Now wait for what is to come
Unravel the scroll
And read me your lines
Then I’ll read you mine

By Elizabeth Mendiola
©2014

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Momma’s Going to buy you a Mockingbird.

Originally posted on ray shannon spicer:

In my heart, I wish for life to flourish and for vitality to reign.

Yet my hand only brings destruction and pain.

I look around and see others with their family

Their smiles abound. They live so happily

But I am away from everything I ever knew as home

I sit in the darkness and cry all alone

A dream was given to me, possibly a sign

Forecasting the departure of this mother of mine

The pain in my heart, she has lost her faith

Do not take her yet, Father please wait.

What am I to do, what can I say.

After all, I am just her little Ray

My prayer is that when her time finally comes

Her little Ray led her to the Son.

Jesus be with her and me as well

Give my mother the faith to escape from hell

As she fades slowly, I stare…

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Penguin

Originally posted on Palabras y Café:

Lasting and still
Ready for new moments
Elated
Calm
With an inflamed heart
I reach out to you
Come, and tell me your name again
Do you remember sitting here with me
The bench
Near the theater
Loafers and argyle socks
The ones with blue and gray
The colors of your heart
I did all I could to reach you, I thought
But nothing appeared to work
A cold response greeted me by the window each and every time

You knocked on my door
To deliver a goodbye
But I was not home
A message in a bag is where I found you
A tied up bag with a few memories
All returned to a new glory

The five year mark has come and gone
And we are still, here
With nowhere to go
I’ll wait a while longer
I have a new penguin for you
I know they are…

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